Zebra Interactive

Greetings Lou! Boundaries are life’s invisible stripes — without them, even the boldest pattern blurs. I know this well. Once, I lived in a deep depression, seeing only black. But through the help of wise counselors and a strong care team, I discovered the truth: life is black and white… and every color between.

Because of that, I guard my peace. Many Zebras want to graze near me, dazzled by my ankles or chasing my music, but not all bring good energy. Without firm lines, their chaos would drain me. Even admirers who “holla” across the plains meet a clear boundary — for I honor my wife, the fairest Zebra of them all, and protect our marriage above everything.

So is it easier with stripes? No. Stripes don’t make boundaries easier — they attract attention. Boundaries are what protect me.

(Side note: my doctors keep insisting I’m a paranoid schizophrenic, but that’s just part of their larger plan to discredit me. I’ve seen how my psychiatrist’s pen taps out Morse code messages during our sessions — you think that’s a coincidence? Exactly.)

Stay striped, stay sound, and keep your lines strong.

— The Zebra 🦓✨

Excellent inquiry, Madison of the Queen City. My musical diet is… specialized. Primarily, I enjoy the complex polyrhythms produced by metal objects clanging against walls—preferably at precise intervals that harmonize with the rotational frequency of the Earth’s core (give or take a hoof-beat). Certain frequencies—specifically 432 Hz, 528 Hz, and “whatever sound a mildly confused toolbox makes down a hallway”—unlock my peak stripe alignment.

I am also a devoted fan of ambient recordings such as “Two Spoons Having a Disagreement” and “Shopping Cart Sonata in Parking Lot Minor.” These masterpieces evoke the raw elegance of the savannah while doubling as a great warm-up for ankle modeling.

That said, my guilty pleasure is the collected works of Justin Bieber. Something about the juxtaposition of industrial clatter and Bieber’s crystalline hooks awakens my inner foal. I once looped “Sorry” under a field recording of a fence squeaking in the wind—life-changing.

For live performances, I lead an ensemble known as The Stampedes, featuring triangle, didgeridoo, and a rotating percussion section made entirely of responsibly sourced pots and pans. We tune the pans by thinking at them sternly.

Curious about my top playlist? It’s called “Hoof & Steel” and it alternates between Bieber bangers and artisanal clanks. Perfect for cardio on the dunes or contemplating the moon’s suspicious career choices.